A new school year for many is cause for excitement, but it can also prompt jitters -- not just in children but in parents as well. Before the sweaty palms and butterflies grow into severe anxiety, experts say, families can act now to make school days a little brighter.
SEPARATION ANXIETY
First 5 Riverside is partnering with Perris Elementary School District for a parent orientation/health safety fair Friday at the Rob Reiner Center and one of the big topics that will be discussed is separation anxiety.
Some of the most nervous students and parents are in the preschool and kindergarten groups, said Carol Jimenez, director of child development programs for Perris Elementary School District.
"A lot of times it's the parents who are very anxious," Jimenez said. "So we talk about separation, introduce the families to the teacher, show them the classrooms and review the parent handbook."
Parents often worry more if the child hasn't had much experience interacting with other children, but Jimenez has found that most children become engaged quickly and make a smooth adjustment.
GETTING ENOUGH Z'S
Children of any age should establish a good sleeping routine before the new year begins. The National Health Institute recommends at least nine hours of sleep each night, even more for younger children.
"Routine is so important," said Carol Abella, program specialist in First 5 Riverside's early care and education department. "Children should have lots of rest and a good night's sleep, a good breakfast in the morning and lots of encouragement."
For parents who are struggling with a child who fights sleep every night, the agency offers tips such as having a consistent bedtime and creating a cool, comfortable sleeping environment free of distraction. Parents can also consult with teachers or attend a workshop on the subject.
WORKING TOGETHER
Many kids are nervous on the first day of school, but for some the feelings of anxiety continue weeks into the school year. For those students it may be necessary to work with educators and counselors at the school to calm the fears.
Diane Peters Mayer is a Pennsylvania-based psychotherapist who specializes in school anxiety and author of Overcoming School Anxiety: How to Help Your Child Deal With Separation, Tests, Homework, Bullies, Math Phobia and Other Worries. Her advice to parents is to talk things through, remain calm, work toward problem solving, cheer qualities and talents in their child and believe in their child's ability to overcome.
"Work as a team," Mayer said. "Say, 'Together we are going to figure out how to make things better for you -- I'm here for you.'"
As much as they'd like to, parents can't fix their child's problems for them, but they can provide guidance and support.
"Believe in your child's ability to work through problems and overcome adversity -- this is empowering," she said. "Also believe in your parenting skills, that you can help your child."
She tells parents to communicate with their children without judgment and no matter what, stay calm.
"Your child is worried and is counting on you to be their rock," Mayer said. "Stay calm ... this will help your child feel safe and to calm down too."
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