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BY DIANNE BRIGHT
GUEST AUTHOR

It's officially spring, but we'll blink and summer will be here. And that means we'll be cleaning off the barbies for hot dogs and burgers. We'll be slathering on loads of sunscreen, blending smoothies, and wiping off watermelon from our kids' faces. Some of you (over-achievers) are already thinking ahead to Fourth of July parties, summer vacations, and a ton of fun family picnics. Baseball fans are getting out the gloves as well, now that Major League Baseball's season has begun.

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But let's be honest, some of us are freaking out about every swimsuit sale in our inboxes. We love the pool but we're beginning to realize that our New Year's diet plan has not been quite as successful as we'd hoped. The truth is, we're gonna have to put on a swimsuit sooner than we'd like because the kids will be begging us to jump into the pool, plus it's gonna be hotter than Hades here in the IE before we know it.

Maybe you're not a pool person, so a bathing suit hunt isn't bugging you. For you, it's those cute floral shorts you were hoping to squeeze into, finally. But they're still a little bit tighter than you remembered them from last summer. Or that little black dress that zips to your waist with the cute ribbon at the end of the zipper, remember that one?

Don't despair, because I'm here to encourage you! I've recently lost a little weight without following any kind of New Year's resolution. I care about the issue of body image in terms of health, but it doesn't run my life. I haven't owned a scale for the past 15 years; nor have I counted calories. I simply don't obsess about how much I weigh because my goal is muscle mass and fat reduction instead of a silly three-digit number.

I think our culture totally overdoes the body image myth most of the time. First off, they tell you that you'll be happier if you're so skinny that you can't eat any of the foods you actually love. hat just doesn't make sense. Second, most ads tell you that you can be a mom and wear a size 1, which isn't usually the case either. Don't you find it refreshing when an advertisement uses a mom who actually looks like she's had a few kids?

So here's my secret: I like to keep it super simple. Let me explain with three basic steps. First, moderate the amount of food that you eat. Don't ditch the ones you looooooove. Just eat half as much of them. If you crave steak and mashed potatoes, eat half of the amount of buttery potatoes (try for low-fat butter and use less salt, too). And go for steamed carrots or broccoli as an additional side so you feel full.

Snack on the good stuff between meals. Grab some lightly salted almonds or a handful of craisins instead of chips. Then reward yourself with frozen yogurt at the end of the day and make tasty protein-filled smoothies after workouts. If you crave a candy bar, split it into thirds and share with a few friends instead of eating the whole thing yourself. This way, you never feel starved. And you don't feel deprived of the good stuff either.

Second, be reasonable! Try to exercise five times per week but don't overdo it. I like to record my workouts every month so I can look back and see my progress (jog, cycle, walk, step class, etc). I see so much consistency that I want to do more the following month. But here's my main advice about moderation: Let it all count! Go for a 10-minute jog and record it on your calendar. And write down the fun stuff too, like 15 minutes out on the trampoline with the kiddos or 20 minutes of soccer in the backyard.

I used to think a workout only counted if it was an hour or two at the gym. But then I'd skip working out altogether, since I didn't have enough time. And that's where most people despair. They start out strong, like "I'm gonna exercise for 90 minutes every day for the next three months." But when shin splints set in two weeks later and sore muscles aren't recovered, they give up their unrealistic goals. Instead, shoot for 10 minutes of moderate exercise five days per week for a couple of weeks. Then increase it to 20 the following week.

Third, know who you are! No matter your age, weight, or skin color, you're gonna have to declare your self-worth from the inside out. Some people actually feel they aren't pretty enough, tall enough, tan enough or something else "enough" to be lovable. And it boggles my mind that many top models are included in that depressed category. So many of us need a new identity! And that starts with the surrender of your heart, body, and mind to a new voice of hope and acceptance.

You may feel like you're not good enough, but the truth is, you are really great the way you are. It's not wrong to aim for balanced health goals, but make sure you're doing it for yourself and not for someone else who might never be impressed anyway. That's the wrong objective! Change who you are because you want to embody a healthier lifestyle and a happier you. You don't owe that to anyone else. Once you feel worthy enough, the changes will come naturally.

You might think that your thighs are unseemly because they're too big after three kids or that those stretch marks need to be forever covered up with a one-piece suit. But you're awesome the way you are because you brought little precious babies into this world. That's a huge accomplishment.

You are incredibly valuable and you matter to God and to me. You aren't too ugly, too fat, too skinny, or too odd-looking to find peace and happiness. I know I can't prove that to you unless you first choose to believe it from the inside of your heart. But when you do, you'll start to see a different person in the mirror as well. And I believe you'll begin to embrace health with more enthusiasm along the way. With a few mindset adjustments, we'll all be longing for summer instead of dreading its arrival.

Remember that your self-worth doesn't have to come from other people's accolades of your physical beauty. Let them see your emotional and spiritual strengths as well, which are based upon things that really matter, like the values inside your heart.

Join the conversation at blogs.inlandsocal.com/moms, PE.com or Momarama's page on Facebook. Or send an email to pe.momarama@yahoo.com. Momarama shares readers' emailed comments with their permission.

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BY DIANNE BRIGHT
GUEST AUTHOR

With three sick kids home from school today and myself recovering from the flu as well, I'm feeling a little blue. Constant laundry, mopping, and sanitizing, along with incessant hand-washing that's turning my hands into lizard-skin. Plus it's hard to see your kids feel so lousy. You just want them to get better, but it takes time.

Certainly, it is that season to get sick, so it's not a surprise that it hit our whole family (minus my hubby, the lucky duck). And it reminds me to be thankful for the healthy days that we have most of the year. The ones where nothing much happens out of the ordinary.

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So many days, we pine for more excitement, more of something we're not even sure of, rather than just being thankful for what's right in front of us. I'll give you a dramatic example. A friend from school recently had an affair on her husband and left him for another man, because her life seemed boring in her current situation. And I'm not making this post about judging her life and what she's gone through. Maybe her husband was a total loser. Then again, maybe he wasn't?

Sometimes, our human nature pushes us to assume there's something better around the corner, when "pretty great" stares us in the eyeballs today! When I think of this friend, it makes me reflect how thankful I am that my marriage approaches its fourteenth year doing well, not full of back-flips, but steadily sustained -- and happy. It's got areas for improvement just like everyone else's, but it makes me glad we haven't given up over the years even when times have gotten tough.

Frequently, I feel like my life is humdrum regarding motherhood. The kids get home from school, throw their shoes and backpacks into our front walkway, and sprint out to the backyard to jump on the trampoline, making enough noise to instantly trigger one of my migraines. Or they race upstairs to play Wii or to watch a video for the hundredth time, making uncontrolled messes as they go.

In all honesty, the lunch preps, the laundry, the homework, the driving, the cleaning -- it can all start to feel so burdensome. You might relate, that your life doesn't amount to more than you'd planned up to this point as well. I'm thankful for all that I have, of course, just like you are. But my attitude often says otherwise. It's occasionally resentful and lame. The whole "poor me" routine replays its sad song like an old '80s jingle that I just can't get out of my head.

Even professionally, I thought I would have published my postmodern novel by now. It was a big 2011 goal of mine that came and went. But I'm not giving up. I'm pressing forward because I believe it's the right thing to do. I have this strange calling to finish it and to edit the heck out of it, no matter what comes of it. Do you have any of those career goals that aren't quite where you'd expected them to be at this point? But it's okay because stuff happens. We get distracted. We run into bad luck. The stars aren't aligned for a certain editor on a particular day.

But life is life! And sometimes you see that friend who wishes she'd made the better choice, but gave up too soon. Or you're stuck at home with your kids as sick as dogs puking over the toilet. These experiences give us perspective (if we allow them to), even if just a few teaspoons at a time.

What about another friend of mine who has to take two months off work to be with her sick kid during his chemo treatments? I bet she'd rather be at home cleaning up his messes all day long, you know? But even then, she's so upbeat, just trusting God that things will work out.

Those boring days seem beautiful and glorious in contrast to some of the stories we hear about. And it's always about a certain mindset that gets us through those tough days or seasons in our own lives as well. Because we know that someone else has it a lot worse than we do. And we also realize that we are usually a lot stronger than we think we are. The tough times often prove how brave we actually are.

All this said, enjoy today! Whether you're home with sick kids like I am, or doing the monotonous pick-up taxi-cab routine in the next hour. Whether you're serving chicken broth and Saltines or a full-on roast with veggies and wine, take in this moment that you've been given.

And before you go making any drastic judgments about your boring life or your boring spouse or your boring kids or your less-than-perfect job, try to be thankful for what you've been given for this season. Sometimes stopping to reflect can be the most refreshing thing you've done all year. And since we're into 2012 now, why not take a few moments to write up a list of all the things you're thankful for?

Join the conversation at blogs.inlandsocal.com/moms, PE.com or Momarama's page on Facebook. Or send an email to pe.momarama@yahoo.com

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MOMARAMA: A greener Christmas

BY DIANNE BRIGHT
Guest Author

Everyone sets those well-intentioned goals for the New Year. But why wait until then? The holidays are the perfect time to put those New Year's resolutions to good use. We should all aim to take better care of the environment, right? So let's get started (especially those of you who are like me and aren't quite done with your shopping yet).

Here are five ways to reduce, reuse or recycle this holiday season:

First, try to buy less. I mean, do you really need a gift for every person you've ever met? Why not stick to a list of your 10 closest family members and friends? You can give a cheerful hug to the rest of those fun-loving acquaintances! And when you wrap those gifts, try to reuse one of last year's gift bags that's still in great shape. Or use one that you've already received this year (as long as it's not going back to the same person).

Second, give stuff that grows. This includes flowers, fruits or vegetables. A neighbor recently gave me five pomegranates from her father-in-law's fruit tree. They are so beautiful and I can't wait to juice them. I've been giving people lemons from my own tree in a bag with a red ribbon. In my opinion, you can't beat organic, home-grown fruit!

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Third, share some of your talents with those you love. It might sound cheese-ball, but think of Grandma getting a thoughtful missive or poem about the reasons you love her, placed in a reasonably priced frame. I'm pretty sure she'll be fine without another pair of pink slippers. Or if you're into music, sing a song for your special someone. Then give him or her a kiss along with a simple ornament containing a picture of the two of you.

Fourth, re-gift items you already own. Go through your closets and look for some well kept treasures you no longer want. I have a really nice red wine print that is in perfect condition. But guess what - I'm not in love with it anymore. The hand-me-down coffee prints from a good friend look much better on my red wall. So now I can gift that one to someone else.

Fifth, give practical gifts to those you love. It sometimes takes away the mystery or the romance, some would say. But I'm thrilled that my husband knows I'd like a new pair of boots, a running watch and a mini-notebook for my writing on the go. If he's gonna spend a few hundred bucks on me anyway, I'd rather get the things I really need. Wouldn't you as well? So go ahead and tell him or her what's on your list.

Reduce, reuse, recycle! It's the green thing to do this Christmas!

Join the conversation at blogs.inlandsocal.com/moms, PE.com or Momarama pages on Facebook. Or send an email to pe.momarama@yahoo.com

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By DIANNE BRIGHT
GUEST AUTHOR

It's important to take time out for each of our kids. In the hustle and bustle of the holiday season, it's easy to forget that a little bit of one-on-one time with our children really matters. And their time in the spotlight is significant as well.

Within the past few days, I've attended three award ceremonies, one for each of our kids. A balloon was given to our bounciest middle child. Our oldest kid got a candy cane full of Reese's Cups. And our little diva got a bouquet of salmon-colored carnations for her job well done.

For each assembly, my iPhone was jamming to catch pics and video clips. I was balancing my Starbucks cup and the treats for my kids, trying to catch my breath from my morning sprint, thinking "Was my van parked in the red?" You've been there before, right?

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Occasionally, I ask myself, "Is it worth all the madness?" I mean, do you think they'd really care if I didn't make it to the assembly, just this once? And we all know the answer, right? Of course it matters! Because when your kid sees your beautiful smile staring over at them (even if they pretend like you're not there because they're playing the "too cool" routine), it makes him or her feel like a million dollars. They feel loved, cared for, valued and important!

And as I chat around with other moms lately, I'm more aware than ever that we're all running on fumes and caffeine. We can barely get our kids dropped off before the bell signals its louder-than-life announcement that we're late!

But even amidst the psychotic rat-race that we're all in, we must slow down to make our kids feel that they're calm in our embrace even in those stressful moments. It's worth the effort to park the car, run them to the gate, and to give them that big bear hug that reminds them we'll be there to pick them up at the end of the day.

They know we'll all sit down for a warm dinner (even if it's take-out; let's be honest, people) together. Even when I ask each of my kids the same questions for the hundredth time, like who they sat by at lunch and what game they played at recess, they know it's because I care about the details of their day. In short, they know that I love them.

And we as parents need those little smiles and hugs to keep us going as well. We get to replay those beautiful moments captured in mere minutes inside our hearts and on our smart phones throughout the day. They motivate us when we're dragging and find it difficult to picture the to-do list all checked off. Grabbing those special moments helps us to have perspective when we can't envision the end of the day arriving quickly enough.

But when life starts to feel too crowded for those precious moments, then it's time for us to cut out some of the other stuff from our busy schedules. If we don't make the time for our kids today, then no-one else will.

The truth is that they really want the winks, smiles, hugs, and words of affirmation from us more than from anyone else in the whole world. And not getting it will affect the way they view themselves and the world around them.

Even if you have a few shy kids who don't let you know how much they appreciate your attendance at their assemblies, your time volunteering in their classrooms, or your extra kisses before drop-offs, know this: It all matters! So don't give up, moms and dads, even if your energy level is so low that you can barely reach the coffee pot each morning.

You are making a difference in your kids' lives. You are doing an amazing job of shaping the next generation because of the sacrifices you're willing to make this season. Keeping it real. Share your thoughts here. We'd love to hear from you!

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Christmas encouragement

I love kids. Their perspectives are so sobering, especially when it comes to issues of faith and hope. My five-year-old daughter loves to talk about death, which might seem strange. But even that pensive topic becomes exciting because of her young and optimistic outlook.

Dianne Bright
Guest Author

Her plethora of questions about death, such as, "When I'm forty-seven, will you be dead?" or "When you are one-hundred-and-ten, will Grammy still be alive?" are ongoing. But her introspection always reminds me of the promise that we have in Jesus.

In my most gentle voice, I usually say, "Well, when you are that old, I will be really old..." or "... by then, Grammy will be in heaven with Jesus." AND THEN my daughter says, "Unless Jesus comes back first."

You see, she actually believes that He might come back during our lifetime. And why shouldn't she? No-one knows the day or time, remember? The Bible tells us that we should be ready at all times, but do we take that challenge seriously?

That truth means we are to live today as if He might actually come back today. Perhaps He will even return tomorrow on Christmas Day. So in light of these thoughts, let's cling to the things that truly matter, like our families and friends and their walk with the Lord.

Time certainly flies by like each passing breath, but let's not fear death. It has no sting, remember? Sickness will come into your life at some point just as the storms arrive to water the earth. But, let it strengthen you as you press into God's power.

Let go of old hurts as well; move on toward God's peace because He can't wait to see you face to face sometime very soon. In that moment, He will take away all of your pain. That means that you can forgive your trespassers today since His love for you is even greater than the hurt that they have caused.

So what would you do if Jesus came back today? Would you be ready to head off to heaven? Would you be done drinking your coffee, paying those bills, cleaning that tile, or wrapping all of those fun presents? You might have to leave that dish baking in the oven... you know... or that load of laundry turning in the washing machine.

Since today is Christmas Eve, let's take a few moments to sit with the Lord, Jesus. Let's rest in His arms and rejoice for what lies ahead: a heaven where there are no tears, no suffering, and a place where every wrong will be righted.

Slow down to hear from the Savior and take a minute to sing to Him. It is His birthday after all! Share your thoughts about heaven and hope. We'd love to hear from you! Merry Christmas! :)

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