Weekly Topic: March 2009 Archives

It still continues to surprise me that you can give my 5 year old any sort of video or computer game and within about 10 minutes, he'll have all the moves figured out. He has the basics down in half the time it takes me nine times out of 10 (which isn't saying much, since I'm fairly technologically challenged). But still. He's 5.

My daughter takes after Mom a bit more, but growing up in a much more technologically rich environment than I did seems to have made an impact on her as well. She's just not that interested in staring at a screen for any extended length of time.

Game systems such as V-tech and Web sites such as sesamestreet.org boast games even two year olds can play, so the little bitty ones can get accustomed to the gamer mentality very early.

Mine like to play games on nick.com, disney.com and a few other sites. There are also some good educational game sites such as starfall.com and funbrain.com.

So far, the kids haven't turned into mindless gamer zombies, but I tend to save game time until after homework on week days. And if they're looking glassy eyed on the weekend, I shoo them outside or find a more active indoor project for a while.

I'm curious what other parents think. How much game time is too much?

Written by guest author Trudie Mitschang:

Trudie Mitschang

Guest Author

For me, making nutrition fun for kids has a lot to do with making it look fun. Children are really visual and observant (my daughter can pick a microscopic piece of mushroom out of a mound of pasta). They also love colorful, bite-sized foods with textures that mimic foods they enjoy - think dried fruit instead of fruit snacks, whole grain crackers in lieu of chips.

Here's a few tips and tricks that have worked with my moderately picky 6 and 10-year olds:

Put it on a stick. Kids love anything skewered. Try chicken and veggie shish-ka-bobs; serve grapes and cheese on toothpicks as an after school snack; and my new favorite: dip half a banana in some vanilla yogurt then roll lightly in granola. Impale it on a popsicle stick and freeze it for a healthy on-the-go breakfast or afternoon treat.

Make it cute. For breakfast, toast whole grain waffles and top with cinnamon apple butter. Then use fruit (raisins work well) to make a smiley face - irresistible.

Give it personality. When my son was a toddler he loved Thomas the Tank Engine so we'd make "Mr. Conductor Peanut Butter Sandwiches" for lunch. For older kids, try Sponge Bob broccoli bites with Plankton sauce (low fat ranch).

Get creative. Introduce white bread lovers to wheat by putting their favorite filling between one slice of white and one slice of whole wheat. Remove the crust and use cookie cutters to make finger sandwiches in fun shapes like hearts, stars and diamonds

Give it a whirl. Smoothies are kid friendly but pricey. Whip up your own at a fraction - Costco sells big bags of smoothie-ready frozen fruit - some are mixed with bits of frozen yogurt for added calcium.

Dip it. Kids will eat almost anything with a dip on the side. Pretzel sticks with low fat almond butter, Trader Joe's corn chips with organic bean dip, or sliced peppers with hummus keep little hands busy.

Be honest. I'm not a fan of the "trick kids by hiding healthy ingredients in their food" trend. I think the goal is to teach them to make smart food choices on their own and show them that nutritious food can be really yummy. With a little creativity, it can even be fun!

Written by guest author Debbie Yocum:

I have an 8 year old daughter that has an imagination that would fill a football stadium. She loves to live in a world of imaginary friends but she also loves to include her little 6 year old brother in her world. Together they take blankets and sheets from the closet and build little forts that they fill with his toy cars and her stuffed animals.

Debbie Yocum
Guest Author

They set up tea parties and make little cards so that all the stuff animals know where their place is at the table. My 6 year old son is not so sure that he is supposed to be playing with dolls so most of the time my daughter is very careful about putting him in charge of the stuffed animals and the trucks and cars that he has collected. She takes care of the dolls.

Since they play behind the walls that they have built, I don't always get to see them interact but I can hear them. I work from home so they play close by to where I am working and I find myself laughing at their interaction. My daughter is playing the mom (me) an my son is playing the dad (my husband).

My daughter uses phrases that I use and my son will say words that my husband always uses. It is actually a good way to listen to how we communicate with each other. When I start to get frustrated, apparently I use the word "honey" a lot. My son will take a set of keys and give my daughter a kiss good-bye with a hug and off to work he will go. I hear him tell my daughter good-bye and he will say "I hope you have a good day. I love you. See you soon" and I realize that our kids really are paying attention to the way that we talk to each other and how we treat each other.

My son will get angry will one of the stuffed animals because they can't find their shirt for flag football or their shoes for school, typical events that will make my husband get frustrated with the kids. When they are role playing it really gives you a good look at how your kids see you and how you can improve the way you communicate with them.

A new thing that the two little ones have been doing is taking a camera that we have that can take videos as well as pictures. They set up a scene with their toys and sometimes with our animals and they make movies. My daughter will write a script and direct the play which my son will be featured in. It is something that they will do for hours. It is a great way to spend their time because they are learning how to make movies on the computer and they are having fun at being creative at the same time.Their world is a mixed with their own imagination and with actual life experiences. I know that they have to grow up but I am really enjoying this time with them. My oldest son is 17 and my youngest son just turned 6 so I know how fast they grow up and I know that this time in their lives is precious. I don't want to miss a minute of it.

Cutest letter ever.

Mt. San Jacinto College art professors spend a lot of time teaching students how to hone their talents and become professional artists. Now it's their turn to shine in the 2009 Biennale Faculty Show, which opens Saturday and runs through April 16 in the college's Fine Art Gallery.

Kurt Miller/The Press-Enterprise

Mt. San Jacinto College art professor Kathie Dillon holds her painting "Incidere ligamen ut recubo," an oil painting of her son. The Latin title translates to "Cut ties that lie."

"There are 17 artists participating and they represent our Menifee, Temecula and San Jacinto campuses," said gallery director Brandelyn Dillaway. "It's an extremely diverse show ... different materials, different styles, all shapes, all colors."

The opening reception, from 3 to 5 p.m. Saturday, will include refreshments by the California Palms Restaurant and live music performed by faculty member Jaime Valdovino It is free and open to the public.

"The piece was spurred by his coming of age. He was 15 and turned 16," Dillon said. "He's 6 feet tall and was getting into some trouble trying to be a tough guy. I wanted to paint something to urge him to be who he was and not to be manipulated by things that aren't important."

Dillon used a technique in her piece that she uses in class to teach perspective. "Tromp l'oeil technique refers to illusion, and it worked because the things we think are so important as teenagers are often an illusion," she said.

Art instructor Chet Glaze teaches at the Menifee campus. This is his first show at the gallery and he will have three pieces of digital art on display, including one titled "Dumbo."

"A lot of my work ... have a link to Disneyland," Glaze said. "They deal tangentially with the supernatural and with desire. I have a strange link to Disneyland; I've already been twice this week ... it's like you are kind of walking in between, in the nexus of desire and reality."

Dillaway said the show, which takes place every other year, "is usually highly anticipated. It's definitely worth coming to see."

OPENING RECEPTION
Where: Mt. San Jacinto College Fine Art Gallery, 1499 N. State St., San Jacinto
When: 3-5 p.m. Saturday
Cost: Free
Info: 951-487-3585, www.msjc.edu/artgallery

Written by guest author Maura Ammenheuser on the topic "Let them be creative":

I am not remotely crafty. As a kid I loved crayons, markers, stickers and my Spirograph. (Does anyone else remember Spirographs?). But I never got into anything involving sewing, cross-stitch, excessive gluing, papier mache, macrame or recycling household objects to make potholders and picture frames.

Maura Ammenheuser
Guest Author

My daughter definitely has an artsy streak and I want to encourage her creativity, though without necessarily getting into the glitter glue up to my eyeballs myself. Possibly my most brilliant parenting purchase ever was an enormous roll of white butcher paper, bought from a teachers' supply store. When my kids are bored, or they have friends visiting who are getting antsy, and I am waaaaaayy too lazy to take them all outside for picnics or baseball contests or whatever, I cover my kitchen table with a giant piece of the paper. Everyone gets to dive into our bucket (an empty 5-gallon ice cream container, and please no comments on the five gallons of ice cream) of crayons, markers and colored pencils. I'm amazed at how happily kids of both genders and many ages will peacefully share the stretch of paper to doodle. Another fun, relatively mess-free activity is laying big sheets of the paper on the floor. The kids trace each other's bodies, then fill in their own silhouette with crayons. They draw silly faces on themselves, wild clothing, brightly-colored fingernails, etc. When my friends' kids are here, I send them home afterward with their life-sized self-portraits, like oversized party favors.

The paper came in a 1,000-foot roll. I think I paid about $60 for it. That was at least four years ago and we still have some left on the roll The only caveat; when the roll was new it was very heavy and difficult to move around. Some teachers' supply shops may sell them in smaller rolls but I'm not sure about that.

My daughter also loves to sing, dance, change her clothes repeatedly all day and "decorate" her hair with as many clips, barrettes and headbands as she can fit on her noggin at once. Santa brought her a karaoke machine this Christmas, which is a huge hit. I indulge her desire to make a lot of sparkly noise (to a certain point) because she is happy and busy expressing herself. I also stopped trying to edit the clothes she chooses for school. As long as she's not too hot, too cold or violating the dress code, anything goes. (Yesterday's outfit: a sky-blue top covered with silvery sequins, a pale green-and-pink floral skirt, knee socks and chunky black shoes).

Our son has a vivid imagination that he feeds with regular doses of "Star Wars" -- the movies, the books, the plastic light sabers. He makes long lists of his favorite characters, inventories the planets mentioned in the series, grills us about arcane "SW" trivia and builds oodles of starships from Legos. Sometimes we pull the plug on all of it and insist he read or watch something different just so The Force doesn't melt his brain. But usually I let him wander off to far galaxies in his head. My daughter needs to emote; my son needs to breathe noisily like Darth Vader. To each his own brand of creativity.

Kids like to get creative. Whether it's painting, drawing, playdough sculpture or just glittering up some pine cones, art projects of all shapes and sizes are a time-honored tradition in our household.

Of course that means I'm always on the lookout for the messy by-products of this creativity, i.e. the trail of glitter, glue, paint and other artwork paraphernalia that has made it onto the walls, carpet, tile, refrigerator, furniture and somehow onto the roof of my car in one especially experimental project.

As a parent, you might be tempted to stop the madness, protect your furniture and seek a more appropriate - quiet and clean - activity. But, according to the experts, that might not be what's best for your child.

Let those kids go wild, said Pamela Atkinson, youth education curator at Riverside Art Museum. It's tempting for parents to have kids do art projects their way, instead of giving kids the creative freedom to make whatever they want.

"This kills the creativity," she said. "Don't make specific expectations about what they need to make. Instead, praise and encourage them whenever they try doing different things."

"The arts develop creativity, problem-solving, communication and interpersonal relationship skills," said Nancy Kirkwood, San Bernardino County Museum's Youth Club educator. "Statistically, kids who have art education achieve more in their academic subjects. Giving kids a vocabulary for appreciating the arts makes it possible for them to interact and be more productive in more ways with more people."

Art classes are educational and - just as important - it's something the kids really enjoy doing, said Tony Moramarco, creative director at Bigfoot Graphics in Temecula. Bigfoot offers a range of art classes for kids and teens through the city of Temecula. Moramarco also teaches several art classes at schools in the area.

The kids are always excited to come to class, he said. "It's good to be an art teacher."

Moramarco recommends parents take their children to museums, art galleries or any type of show that will introduce them to a variety of art mediums.

Written by guest author Maura Ammenheuser on the topic "Finding the right pet":

We have allergies in this family, so pets with fur or feathers are not an option for us (though everyone in the house wants a dog except me). We kept fish a few years ago, our first and only foray into pet world. My husband brought home a 35-gallon aquarium and we filled it with mollies and other basic pet-store freshwater fish. (Saltwater fish are the tropical ones that have such beautiful colors. However, we've heard they're also far more expensive and high maintenance than your basic goldfish, so we steered clear of them.)

Maura Ammenheuser
Guest Author

My daughter was a preschooler at the time and my son in early primary grades. The fish made good pets for such young kids. They liked sprinkling the food into the tank (we only had to feed the fish once each day). The tank sat in our family room and we enjoyed watching the fish drift around in there. The kids' friends were fascinated. I even liked the bubbling noises from the filter. The whole thing was rather Zen. One morning my son discovered a dead fish. I had no idea what to say to him about life, death and the imminent flushing. Before I could find words, he said -- seriously -- "before Daddy wakes up, can we buy another fish just like it and not tell Daddy it died?"

The big problem with fish, other than the unfortunately frequent need for flushing, however, was that nobody liked cleaning the tank. Another reason I've resisted a dog is that I can barely keep up with the housework already on my plate. Adding another living being to the house that needs daily upkeep would completely overwhelm me. Unlike walking a dog, cleaning a fish tank doesn't really HAVE to be done at any particular moment. But for me, the reality is any chore without a deadline just doesn't get done, at least not on any schedule or with the appropriate frequency. (Dinner gets cooked every night. Windows never get washed.) So as the aquarium got progressively grungier, I ignored it but my hubby would eventually get grossed out enough to clean it. I was hugely grateful. He was hugely cranky.

A dingy tank wasn't what ended our fishkeeping years, however. The tank developed a leak. Long story short, it would only leak if we filled it more than about two-thirds full. So we kept the water level low. However, that amplified the formerly peaceful babble of water cascading out of the filter to an annoyingly loud gush. It was hard to have phone conversations in the same room. A friend of mine came over one day and asked, "doesn't all that water noise make you need to pee?" I laughed hard at that ... then needed a potty break.

Eventually we decided we didn't have the will to do the minimal chores necessary to maintain the tank. It was getting even grubbier, because whenever we needed quiet, we'd turn off the filter so we could hear ourselves think. As the fish slowly died off we stopped replacing them. To cushion the blow for the kids, we donated the surviving fish to my daughter's preschool and told her she could visit them there. (Last I checked, our fish were thriving in the teachers' care, most likely delirious with bubbly gratitude that they'd escaped the slum back at our house.) We gave away the empty aquarium at a yard sale -- to a woman whose son needed it for his pet iguana. One family's trash is another family's iguana condo.

Written by guest author Debbie Yocum on the topic "Finding the Right Pet":

Debbie Yocum
Guest Author

We inherited our German Shepherd dog Daisy from my sister-in-law's family when we purchased their home about seven years ago. Along with the dog also came a Parakeet and a frog and all fit in well with the rest of our family. Daisy was around 9 years old at the time and loved the kids as if they were her own. In fact my 6-year-old son said her name as his first word.

Once he started to walk, he and Daisy would spend the entire day exploring the 2 acres that the both loved. Daisy taught him to dig in the dirt and I even watched her teach him to drink from a dripping faucet next to the house. As she got older Daisy developed cancer and we had to have several tumors removed. We decided to get a new puppy but didn't really want to get another guard dog because Daisy was the alpha dog and we did not want to replace her, we just wanted to get her a friend for her old age. We found a Golden Retriever puppy in the paper and named him Charlie. Daisy and Charlie loved each other and we were happy with the fit. The only problem was that Charlie wanted to play a little too much and he was wearing Daisy out.

As time went on we became even more aware of Daisy's declining health. We decided it was time to get another German Shepherd puppy so that Charlie had a friend and so that Daisy would get some rest from Charlie always wanting to play. We searched around and found a friend that had gotten a female puppy from their uncle whose dogs had just had puppies. The puppies were not planned but the dog's owners were moving and had placed both male and female together for a short period of time on to find out later that the female was pregnant now they were looking for homes for these puppies.

Buddy

The mother was a beautiful German Shepherd but the dad was a very tall and it was obvious that he had a lot of wolf in him (the owners acknowledged that was half timber wolf). The father of the puppies was placed in a separate covered pen from the mother with a group of barking Jack Russell Terriers. All of them seemed to get along great which gave me a little relief when I thought about the stories that I heard about wolf hybrids'. We decided to leave without taking the puppy so that we could call other owners of the same type of dog that we were considering to get their input.

After several calls with the same positive information we decided to go back and pick up our puppy. We named him Buddy and he has turned out to be a very good, non-aggressive 160-pound family dog. He has the coloring of his mother and the eyes and the size of his father. We understand now why his father was in a covered pen because Buddy can jump and fence, anytime, anywhere, which is one reason to not want to get another wolf hybrid.

To be on the safe side, we put Buddy in the K9 Companion dog training camp near Lake Matthews which made Buddy a better dog. Daisy passed away a couple of years ago and both Buddy and Charlie seemed to know that she was really sick on her last days. They stopped their constant playing to lie down next to her more often as if they knew that was what she needed. She was the queen and can never be replaced but we love Buddy and Charlie too. They have all become a part of our family.

Lawmakers have suggested new legislation in both Missouri and Georgia to limit the number of embryos that may be implanted by fertility clinics in response to octuplets mom, Nadya Suleman's current situation. After giving birth to octuplets on Jan. 26 in addition to her other six children, Suleman has relied on food stamps and disability income to provide for her 14 total children.

There have been some criticisms of the legislation because it could make having even one child more difficult for women who wish to become mothers. And some infertility doctors are saying the number of embryos transferred should be left up to the medical experts who are more familiar with individual patient needs and histories.

Supporters say the measure is needed to create boundaries for the lucrative baby-making business. The Missouri bill would follow guidelines from the American Society for Reproductive Medicine, which includes a recommendation that the number of embryos implanted should be based on the potential mother's age and prognosis for a successful pregnancy.

Legal experts say limiting a woman's right to procreate will raise all sorts of constitutional concerns. And, the Medical Board of California said it was looking into Suleman's case to see if there was a "violation of the standard of care."

The Associated Press contributed to this report.

Written by guest author Debbie Yocum on the topic "Talking to kids about money":

My son has a dog that loves to run and he did just that one Sunday afternoon about a month ago. So my son and I took off looking for him only to find a couple of dated RV's parked in the hills not too far from our house. The places that these RV's were parked were hidden from the main streets in a rural area near our home. The RV's are mobile so they come and go after a week or so, usually bringing their outdoor barbeques with them and their chairs.

Debbie Yocum
Guest Author

The group that surrounds the RV's are usually not well kept and they do not want to see us any more than we want to see them. They want to remain invisible. Not far from our house is a development of new 1 million dollar homes and I doubt any of them know that these homeless people are living almost in their backyards. Who would have ever thought that we would have homeless people living so close to us?

There was a carjacking at my youngest son's preschool recently and it happened while his preschool teacher was in the car. I was there picking up my son minutes after it happened and it was frightening. All the kids in the school knew what was going on outside because other teachers came out there to try to help the teacher but the carjacker nearly ran them all over. They thought that man stealing the car came from the vacant property next door which has been overgrown by trees and bushes where he had been living with a group of other homeless people.

It is scary times but we don't want our kids to grow up being scared all the time. We tried to explain to the kids that we are being a lot more cautious these days. We close our gate to our property more often; we watch what we buy and where we spend our money. We use a site online that you can get coupons on for almost anything, clothes, shoe stores, restaurants, etc. They have coupon codes where you can get dinners out, buy one and get the other free. The coupons are good for free shipping, percentage off specials and during these times, anything that saves you money is something to look into. I check the clearance items online for certain items that the kids need that are no longer available in the stores such as the snow boots that I just bought my son and daughter for $11.98.

We make a menu once a week for the whole week and buy the food at one time so that we don't make several trips to the store. It seems that once you are in the store, you end up buying 10 more things than you really need. We save all of our cans and bottles and the 4 youngest kids picked up an extra $50 last weekend when they turned them in. We gave the money to them so they could see how to manage their money. In the past they would go straight to Target with their money but this time I noticed that they have been saving it. Right now, I have to agree that saving as much money as possible is the best thing you can do.

Written by guest author Maura Ammenheuser on the topic, "Talking to kids about money":

Our kids have heard my husband and I discuss the economy, the recession, the housing market, our finances in general, etc. This school year we did not put our kids in after-school activities, partly due to cost and partly to sharpen their focus on homework. They were disappointed by that, of course, and my son occasionally asks when he can resume karate.

Maura Ammenheuser
Guest Author

For the most part they've accepted that we're taking this school year off. I have not discussed finances directly with my children, however. (On a rare occasion when I did, I told them I have to work harder to earn the same amount of money as previously, because I took a pay cut. My 6-year-old said, "You work?" .... Sigh.)

My son is such a worrier; it wouldn't take much to stress him out. Also so much of what's happened in the economy is on a huge, national scale. The kids know I'm trying to cut our grocery costs, for example, and I point out prices to them frequently (of their favorite desserts, toys they want to buy from school fundraisers, etc.) But it's difficult to explain the housing market, the tanking stock market or the variations in gasoline prices to grade-schoolers and get them to understand the direct or indirect effect those factors have on our spending.

I try to strike a balance between explaining things to them so they have an inkling of what's going on in the world around them, and avoiding burdening them with too much information. They're a happy couple of kids and I don't want them to become too aware of things they're missing out on (besides karate classes, we're cutting back on eating out, traveling, new clothes and birthday presents). There's no sense in pointing out the cutbacks if the kids haven't noticed yet themselves. Beyond that I'd love to hear other moms' ways of handling the subject!