Weekly Topic: April 2009 Archives

Written by Guest Author Trudie Mitschang:

With so much coverage about the threat the swine flu outbreak poses, especially for young children, it's easy for moms to panic. Local emergency rooms in Redlands were swamped with people this past week - many of them families with young children - wanting to be tested for swine flu. None who were tested actually had the bug.

Trudie Mitschang

Guest Author

While it's better to be safe than sorry, knowing what symptoms to look for can alleviate a lot of unnecessary worry. People who are infected may experience fevers over 100 degrees, body aches, headaches, cough, runny nose, and sometimes, nausea and diarrhea. According to the CDC, if your child experiences any of the following warning signs, you should seek emergency medical care:

• Fast breathing or trouble breathing
• Bluish skin color
• Not drinking enough fluids
• Not waking up or not interacting
• Being so irritable that the child does not want to be held
• Flu-like symptoms improve but then return with fever and worse cough
• Fever with a rash

In adults, emergency warning signs that need urgent medical attention include:

• Difficulty breathing or shortness of breath
• Pain or pressure in the chest or abdomen
• Sudden dizziness
• Confusion
• Severe or persistent vomiting

Experts agree that good hygiene is your best defense against swine flu. Remind kids to wash hands frequently and cover coughs and sneezes with a tissue, or practice the "elbow sneeze." Avoid touching your eyes, nose or mouth - germs spread this way. A trip to Cabo is obviously ill-advised right now and it's probably a good idea to avoid large crowds found at amusement parks and sporting events. Obviously you should try to avoid close contact with sick people and if you or your child does get sick with influenza, CDC recommends that you stay home from work and school. One thing you don't have to forego though is that BLT you planned for lunch. Despite rumors to the contrary, you cannot catch swine flu by eating pork.

Written by guest author Maura Ammenheuser on the subject On a Budget:

The Santa Rosa Plateau Ecological Preserve in Murrieta is such a treasure. I take my two kids there at least once every school break, year-round. We meet up with friends and hike a trail. The kids get their wiggles out in the fresh air and the grownups enjoy the magnificent scenery.

Maura Ammenheuser
Guest Author

The preserve includes 8,300 acres and a broad spectrum of ecosystems, some of which are rare both in Southern California and the U.S.

We haven't had much luck spotting wildlife, probably because when our group full of kids troops through it scares the animals into hiding! However, we saw a beautiful, enormous red woodpecker on one visit, a tarantula on another (creepy and fascinating -- wonderful entertainment for children) and last time (in February), frogs mating in the vernal pools. They produced unbelievable numbers of eggs, teensy black globes in huge strings that measured many yards. We were amazed.

The preserve's visitor center is open 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. daily. It offers docents who can answer questions, some displays explaining the plateau's geography and animal population (which includes snakes and bobcats, among other critters), trail maps and blessedly clean restrooms. The preserve itself is open longer than the visitor center, sunrise until sunset daily. There are Port-a-Pottys at the trail heads if you are there during hours the visitor center is closed.

I've only hiked two of the preserve's many trails, the one-mile Granite Loop, an easy walk that starts and ends at the visitor's center, and another, miles-long trail that goes past the seasonal vernal pools (they only contain water after winter rains) and leads to the adobes, bunkhouses used by cowboys in the mid-1800s. The adobe site is shaded by a 400-year-old tree and is an ideal picnic spot. The Granite Loop also has a few spots with tables or benches that allow picnicking. (Bring a camera; these rest spots are good places to take candid shots of your kids.) You must bring all your trash out with you, though, including food scraps, so pack a trash bag in your cooler. Biking and horseback riding are allowed on some trails, but call the visitor center for details at 951-677-6951, or see this link: http://www.riversidecountyparks.org/locations/nature-historic-centers/santa-rosa-plateau/

As if the scenery and getting-back-to-nature aspect of the preserve weren't wonderful enough, here's another reason I love going there: The cash-only fee is just $2 per adult, and $1 per kid age 2 to 12. The preserve is at 39400 Clinton Keith Rd., Murrieta, 92562. Find it from I-15 off the Clinton Keith exit heading west.

A final tip: On your way home from the preserve, stop by the Rite Aid on Clinton Keith Rd. at Palomar St., just before you hit I-15. The store includes an ice cream shop. A single scoop is just $1.19! Doubles, $1.69; triples (!!!) $1.99.

Share your ideas for cheap family fun here.

For more cheap family fun go here.

Last year Great Oaks High School student Nicole MacKeller saw a problem that she wanted to solve. Many of the girls at her school weren't attending events such as Winter Formal, Homecoming and Prom.

The reason? They couldn't afford a new dress.

She and her mom, Tracy MacKellar, put their heads together and in October they came up with the idea for "The Couture Girl's Closet," a non-profit organization that collects donated gowns.

They take the gowns, dry clean them and ready them for the big night. Teens in need of assistance are then able to choose a dress free of charge on the condition that the gown is returned after it's worn.

Donations for formal dresses or accessories can be left at Great Oak High School attention Mr. Skaggs or arraignments for pickup can be made at thecouturegirlscloset@msn.com.

Great Oak High School
32555 Deer Hollow Way
Temecula, CA 92592

The Couture Girl's Closet
42030 Avenida Alvarado, Suite F
Temecula, CA 92590
(By Appointment Only)
951-757-2538
http://thecouturegirlscloset.com/default.aspx

By Erica Shein
The Press-Enterprise

Marly Benavides, 19, of San Jacinto, didn't think she could afford to go to the prom.

"I would have to miss the last thing you do in high school," she said. "Going to prom is about making a memory that lasts forever."

The 12th-grader from Mountain View Alternative High School in San Jacinto lives with her husband and 6-month-old baby. With rent to pay and diapers to buy, going to the prom wasn't something she had money for.

Then she found Sunwest Village, a senior community in Hemet that's collecting dresses to help girls attend the formal event. This is the community's first year collecting dresses. Organizers reach out to five high schools in the area to let students know about the program.

Sunwest Village is one of many groups collecting used dresses, suits and accessories to help students create lasting memories of high school. The clothing is dry-cleaned and organized by sizes and styles.

With prom tickets averaging $60 and dresses starting at $150, many families cannot afford to send their students to the prom. Organizers said the economic downturn has increased the demand for help.

"It's so obvious to us that kids weren't participating in events like prom because of the expenses," said Christi Curtis, assistant principal at Paloma Valley High School in Menifee.

The high school organizes the Princess for a Night program. In its second year, the program has about 200 dresses in many sizes, colors and styles.

Curtis noticed that students who benefit from the program aren't all from families traditionally recognized as "underprivileged."

"Every family can use that extra help during times like this," she said.

Pat Williams, 68, of Mentone, organizes the Angel's Closet program at Redlands East Valley High School.

Williams and her granddaughter started collecting dresses for homecoming last October. She has about 140 dresses at her home. About 10 girls have trickled in to look for a dress. She said it's a rewarding experience to watch the girls find their dress.

The girls sift through the satin dresses, twirl in front of the mirror and chat with their friends and mothers to single out the perfect dress.

"It's like they are at a department store," Williams said. "The looks on their faces are priceless."

LaRee Orland, counselor at Redlands East Valley, said charity groups face the difficulty of identifying students who need help.

"There's definitely a need at the school, but we can't help the students if they don't tell us," she said.

Schools are hesitant to reach out to individual students because they don't want to embarrass them. Most groups try to create private shopping sessions, so students wouldn't have to acknowledge that they need help in front of their peers.

For example, the Princess for a Night program at Paloma Valley offers individual appointments for girls to pick out their dresses.

"It's cool that no one has to know," said Holly Lanier, 18, of Nuevo, a senior at Paloma Valley. "You have the whole room to yourself. It's even better than shopping at the mall."

Benavides is excited about the prom and happy about the dress she picked out at Sunwest Village. It's a strapless red dress with a diamond brooch. Benavides said she knew right away that the David's Bridal dress was "the one."

"It's like it's made for me," she said. "It fits perfect and it didn't cost a penny."

To donate

• Sunwest Village in Hemet, 951-925-0822


• Tahquitz High School in Hemet, 951-765-6300


• Redlands East Valley High School in Redlands (Angel's Closet Program), 909-389-2500; and ask for counselor's office


• Paloma Valley High School in Menifee (Princess for a Night Program), 951-672-6030


• Chaparral High School in Temecula (Cinderella's Closet Program), 951-695-4200

This year's proms may retain their sheen of glitz and glam, but the truth is, teens are spending a lot less money on the traditional last big bash of the school year.

"Although times are not very favorable, going to prom for many students is a rite of passage," said Sandra Rodriguez, principal at San Bernardino High School.

Students, both individually and in committee groups, are seeking inexpensive alternatives on everything from clothes to transportation to dining to keep the tradition alive despite economic woes affecting many families.

AllStar Events & Venues in the Rancho Santa Margarita area of Orange County works with 45 high schools in Orange, Riverside and San Bernardino counties to negotiate the best prices on prom details such aslocation, catering and music.

Ed Crisostomo/The Press-Enterprise

Nichole Griffith, 18, of Murrieta, shows her prom dress. Her advice to other teens: "Don't be afraid to go to the sales rack."

"We just came out of winter formals and the numbers for that were down," said Kenny Paul, owner of AllStar. About half the schools working with AllStar saw a drop in attendance, and most of those affected were in areas with a great deal of new homeownership such as in Lake Elsinore, Rancho Cucamonga and Temecula.

Riverside's John W. North High School saw a similar trend for its Midwinter Ball.

"We saw a marked decrease in attendance," said Rebecca Porter, activities director at North for 17 years. "We had 275 students this year and just about 500 last year. Tickets were only $25 ... we had fewer students attend this year than any of the previous years."

"We have approached our prom this year with great caution," Porter said. It is sponsored by the junior class, and in response to economic struggles this year, they are sponsoring a new fundraiser called "Threads." They are accepting donations of prom dresses, which are being sold at discount prices ($5-$10). Staff members also sometimes sponsor students by buying their prom tickets.

Tickets for prom generally cost about $40 to $60 depending on the location, much the same as in previous years, Paul said. But ticket price is usually only a small percentage of the total prom experience.

A gown can cost several hundred dollars, a limousine for the night may cost $500 or $600 and dinner can add about $20 or $30 per person, Porter said. Many students split these costs, but it can still add up to a $400 or $500 night.

North High senior Rachel Hale is sharing a limo with seven other students.

"It'll be $65 per person for the limo to pick us up, take us to dinner and prom and then back home again," Hale said. "I haven't gotten the dress yet, but dinner will be summer casual, so it'll cost about $20."

At the other end of the spectrum, North High student Katelin Wollner is borrowing her dress from a friend, and her group plans to carpool to dinner then prom, eating at Chipotle or somewhere similarly casual. With her $50 prom ticket and dinner, the total for the night will be around $60.

"I've seen some groups doing dinners at home before the dance, rather than eating out," Paul said. "Students are getting alternative transportation to limos, the boys are going with suits instead of tuxes ... event photographers are seeing a big drop. These are some of the things people feel they can pass on."

"One thing we're doing is for schools anticipating lower numbers, we're going back to venues where schools have already scheduled and getting them lower minimums," Paul said. "These schools are hurting from a budget standpoint themselves and don't have the extra money to subsidize a lot. The locations are working with the schools to meet their needs."

Individual students are looking for cheap alternatives to the clothing expense by shopping at outlets, thrift stores and sales racks for dresses, shoes and accessories.

Nichole Griffith, a senior at Murrieta Valley High School, found her prom dress on a clearance rack at Windsor, a women's apparel and accessory store in Corona, for $14.99. The dress is a shiny satin material with ornate beading along the v-neck front and strips of material over both shoulders and across the back.. Gold strappy shoes also bought on sale completed the look.

"With the economic times we are facing, teen prom shoppers are forced to buy cheaply," Griffith said. "I got my prom dress and shoes for a total of $17.16. The dress still had the original price tag of $149.90. My shoes cost $1 at a going-out-of-business sale."

North High teacher Rosalyn Anderson takes a group of students to the Jessica McClintock Outlet in Montclair each year for dresses. This year she took six students, three of whom found prom dress deals.

"I also ask friends to let me have any of their prom dresses hanging in closets collecting dust, and then I spread the word I have dresses available in my classroom for anyone interested."

"I paid $25 ... a lot of people don't have enough money and most of us are paying for our own dresses," said Cristal Flores, one of Anderson's students. "My boyfriend is borrowing a tuxedo from a friend."

Jessica McClintock Outlet manager Karina Ulloa has noticed business increasing this year.

"I've been working here for seven years and business had really gone down over the past couple years," Ulloa said. "But now it's picking up again. April and May are the busiest months with graduations and weddings."

"We have items from last season or two years ago. Or sometimes we get stuff from this season that was overstocked or has some small damages," Ulloa said. "They are 50 to 75 percent off the boutique prices, and then sometimes we have an additional discount sale.

Senior Lucia La Rosa found the most inexpensive gown -- $15 -- Anderson has seen in four years of outlet trips with students.

"No one has much money right now, so I think it was a good deal," La Rosa said. "For girls, the outlet is the best place I've heard of. The guys don't know what to do, they're going crazy."

Here's another summer camp site with a ton of options: Pali Adventures Overnight Adventures

Campers can choose from 19 specialty adventures in four categories including Action, Performing, Creative and Leadership. Camps are for kids ages 9 to 16, except for Leadership, which focuses on fostering leadership skills for kids ages 15 and 16 only. Kids can stay from one to 10 weeks. Campers usually choose one area of specialty for the week. They participate in activities in that specialty area during the morning and then in the afternoon, the camper can decide on several electives. So he or she may spend a day in broadcasting, then go waterskiing, prepare a culinary dish and get a facial later that afternoon.

Open house is coming up!

Where: Pali Mountain, 30778 Highway 18, Lake Arrowhead
What: Have lunch, play games, try the ropes course, etc.
When: 1-4 p.m. May 3
RSVP: www.paliadventures.com/open-house-rsvp

Action
Extreme Action Adventure - Action packed, dirt filled, adreneline pumped adventures.
Girl Power Extreme - Lots of action, plus custom activities ranging from spa treatments to self defense classes.
Hollywood Stunt Camp - Professional stuntment will train campers to jump, tumble, stage-fight and high-fall doing major motion picture stunts.
Horseback Riding - Learn riding skills such as trotting, cantering and posting from expert equestrians.
Motorsports Extravaganza - Learn cutting edge driving techniques and precision racing maneuvers on all three of Pali's dirt tracks.
Secret Agent Camp - Learn stealth tactics, undercover maneuvers while participating in spy games, paintball challenges, high ropes course acrobatics and more.
Skate Camp - Learn to ollie, kick flip and grind the rails like a pro at Pali's custom skate park.
Watersports Extravaganza - During three hours of semi-private lessons by instructors will have you

Performing
Acting Academy - Campers will learn the basics of acting and are encouraged to explore difference genres including classical drama, comedy and action.
Broadcast Journalism - Campers will create and host a broadcast that airs each night at dinner for all of camp and then at 11 p.m. of the Web keeping parents informed of camp happenings.
Dance Academy - Professional dance instructors will guide campers through the basics of jazz, ballet, hip-hop, tap free form and contemporary dance.
Rock Star Camp - Learn the ins and outs of the business of rock and roll.
Theatre Academy - Learn everything there is to know about putting on a theater production and then put on a show.

Creative
Culinary Institute - Prepare up to ten dishes including Polynesian meatballs, panko-crusted vegetables with teriyaki dipping sauce and five cheese corn quesadillas with a team of camper chefs.
Fashion Design Institute - Become a trendsetter and design your own clothing lines from scratch.
Film Institute - Learn tips and tricks from industry experts on lighting, sound, camera work, editing technologies and more.
Magazine Publishing Camp - Experience positions such as publisher, editor-in-chief, staff writer, photographer, graphic designer, distributor and more at a working publication.
Movie Makeup Academy - With the help of professional Hollywood makeup artists, campers will learn makeup application, creating unique disguises and more.

Leadership
Counselor in Training - Designed for campers age 16 who are interested in working as a summer camp counselor.
Leadership - For 15-year-olds who hope to become Pali camp counselors or want to develop leadership abilities for college and life.

Share your ideas for summer camp here.

For more summer camp ideas go here.

Written by guest author Maura Ammenheuser on the topic "Are kids' ads too sexy?"

I saw the Burger King ad. I probably would not have noticed it much except that I had already read something about it, and that there's at least one parenting group that's complained to Burger King. Usually when the TV ads come on, I bury my nose in a magazine or a book.

Maura Ammenheuser
Guest Author

But meanwhile my kids' eyes are still glued to the TV, commercials and all, and sure enough, when the SpongeBob/Burger King/butt-shaking ad played out, there was my not-quite-7-year-old daughter, on her feet and shaking her tushie all over the family room.

She has an annoying enthusiasm for this little move anyway and it doesn't take much to get her started. (I'm still not sure where she picked it up originally -- from TV ads? Movies?) Usually when my girl pulls a move like this, I have two conflicting reactions, which clearly aren't helping my parenting. I'm part horrified and part struggling not to laugh, because she really is funny, jumping all over the place with a gleeful grin and still too innocent to really grasp the sexual connotations of what she sees.

So I was dismayed that Burger King decided to encourage some grade-school butt-shimmying, but meanwhile I haven't yet come up with a pat explanation for my children of the too-sexy stuff they see on TV. (We HAVE discussed "bad" words, by telling out kids they can ask us what any word means and we will calmly explain it. Then we add that these words are usually uttered by grownups who aren't articulate enough to use better words, and at any rate, they're not kid words so don't use them. Etc., etc.)

I did read a magazine article about a year ago that advised parents to explain to school-age children that "sexy," whether as a general concept or a specific gesture or piece of clothing, is something that grownups feel, and that when the kids grow into adult bodies they'll feel it too, but as children their bodies are not ready for that, so they don't have to act, talk, dress or move "sexy." I thought that was as good a way to deal with the matter as any other but I honestly have not had this conversation nearly enough, especially with my little booty-shaking daughter.

Prom season is upon us and for many families, the cost might be a tough sell this year. But some schools and students are gearing up for the challenge with creative solutions.

Nichole Griffith already did her shopping for her Murrieta Valley High School prom, scheduled for May 2 at the San Diego Wild Animal Park. She hit a Windsor Fashions clearance rack and snagged a prom dress for $14.99 (original price $149.90). The matching shoes were a $1 thrift store find.

Ed Crisostomo/The Press-Enterprise

Murrieta resident Nichole Griffith, 18,tries on her new prom dress purchased off a sales rack at Windsor Fashions.

"I went to a local thrift store and it just happened to be all shoes for $1 day," Griffith said. "The dress didn't look good on the rack, but after you took it off the hanger it was so nice. My last prom dress ... sophomore year ... was $60, still pretty good. It was on sale too."

After sharing her good deals with friends, many others decided to head for the sales racks, hoping for similar finds.

Rosalyn Anderson, a teacher at John W. North High School in Riverside has her own yearly prom tradition. She drives a group of students to the Jessica McClintock Outlet in Montclair to search for prom deals.

"Yesterday I took six girls," Anderson said. "Three of the six bought dresses, one dress was $40 ... the other two $15 and $25. I also ask friends to let me have any of their prom dresses hanging in closets collecting dust to donate them to me and then I spread the word that I have dresses available in my classroom for anyone interested."

San Bernardino High School also has a program for prom and other formal occasions.

"Each year our cheer coach and prom teacher advisor seeks dresses from the staff, graduates and community members for clean and gently worn formal dresses," said Sandra Rodriquez. "We also work with a seamstress located across the street from our school. She makes custom dresses at extremely low prices."

This year San Bernardino High School's prom will be at the Queen Mary in Long Beach. It was booked about a year in advance.

"For the last two years we have offered packages that include prom tickets, cap and gown; and other senior activities," Rodriguez said. "We encourage our families to utilize the payment plans ... we offer plans that will spread the costs over a school year.

"Although times are not favorable, going to prom for many students is a rite of passage. For many, it will be their first date or their first formal event. Our families want to make sure that their children have a great memory of this special event ... I know that our school communities and business partners will work together to ensure a spectacular night for our kids."

If you have ideas/suggestions for creating a great prom on a tight budget, please share here!

Written by Guest Author Trudie Mitschang:

My general approach to parenting is that most things are O.K. in moderation. I apply that principle to sugary snacks, TV time and video games. I realize my philosophy is somewhat subjective since moderation for one mom may cross the common sense line of another.. And at the risk of churning out clichés, every kid really is different. Some are more easily addicted to activities than others, and I think the key is making sure that video games are one of their favorite pastimes, not their only pastime.

Trudie Mitschang

Guest Author

When my kids got their first gaming systems, they wanted to play constantly. My daughter, at 6, is not as obsessed as my 11-year old son, but they can both get pretty zoned out if I let them. One thing that helps, especially with my son, is scheduling play dates with kids who have other interests besides gaming. I notice when he hangs out with friends who enjoy spending the afternoon practicing ollies, he's more focused on competing in the skate park than winning virtual world wars.

When it comes to setting limits on playing time, I think exposing kids to as many other activities as possible is better than telling them they need to stop playing video games so often. That just turns it into a power struggle, and as moms, we already have enough of those to contend with..

My kids like to remind me that most of their friends have way cooler gaming systems than we do. I've always felt a bit smug about that fact; I was not buying a new system just because the neighbors had one. We had a Playstation, and doggonit that was good enough! But as I write this blog, I realize I've gradually given an inch and then a yard - we now have a Playstation, Xbox, PSP (Playstation Portable) two Leapsters, and three Nintendo DS systems (one is broken). We even had the Wii for about a year, but sold it on eBay after the kids lost interest.

Now what was I saying about moderation?